Big News! I have a new job!!

Thanks for being so patient with my non-blogging over the past two weeks. Things have been a little crazy at our house... I have a new job!!!

It will be hard to leave my kiddos at Leadership Scholars, but I have an exciting new opportunity that I'm just totally over the moon about. I'll be joining 4C for Children as their Director, Development.

4C is our region’s pioneering leader, advocate and resource for high-quality early childhood education and care—and has won many, many awards for being an outstanding place to work. 


My last day at Leadership Scholars will be July 6, and my first day at 4C will be July 16. Do you know what that means?? A STAYCATION in between! A full week with no work and responsibilities... Pinterest crafts, here I come!


Hopefully I'll be back to my regular blogging schedule, but be patient with me if I'm not. The next month is going to be a bit crazy for me!

It's okay to not like things...

This post is going to be a rant, and there's just no way around it. I feel like everywhere I turn, people are being just plain mean to each other. Not always intentionally, not always blatantly, but there's just so much MEAN.

Case in point. A pregnant friend told another friend the name of her baby the other day. Response? "Oh really? I hate that name." SERIOUSLY? This isn't your baby!!!

I was told recently that there were only two things someone would never volunteer for in our community because they were a waste of time. The two things? The things that person knows I dedicate almost all of my volunteer time to. Ouch.

This happens in the political realm as well. I have a lot of family and friends who don't share the same political views that I do - which is fine. What isn't fine is that I sometimes get bullied about mine and told they aren't okay. Why? I don't say those things to them... ever. I would never tell people that their beliefs were wrong, even though I don't agree with them. (Am I giving away my political views here??).

Everyone doesn't have to agree. In fact, it would be a really boring world if everyone did. But does that mean we have to be mean about it? Why can't we disagree with each other but still be nice about it?

I'm not the only one suffering from these feelings. Adrianna from Crafterhours shared this video a few days ago and I've been thinking about it ever since. I think we should all adopt it as our motto. Warning: it does contain mildly offensive language. Side note: if you don't read Crafterhours, start right now. You will not regret it.

So please, just be nice. If you don't like the names of my future children, you don't need to tell me. Don't share my political beliefs? It doesn't matter. Let's just agree to disagree - we can still be friends. Think that the color of my bedroom is ugly? Keep it to yourself. Don't volunteer where I do? Good - that means somewhere else gets your service time.

Next I'll be back with my sunny attitude and potentially even a project. But in the meantime... it's okay to not like things. Let's just be nice about it. Enjoy your holiday weekend!!

I'm Finished!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today I'll spend my last internship shift at the hospital. And when I walk out the door, I have completed all of the requirements for my master's degree.

I'm just letting it sink in. Because after two long, long, hard, years, it's over. It's finished. And it feels awesome!!

                                     

For the very first time in our six year relationship, Zac will work "normal" hours (no evenings or weekends) and I won't have class. What are we going to do with ourselves?? It's going to be amazing.

First, we're celebrating with a vacation. And then... everything I haven't had time for for the past 2 years! Thanks for all of your love and support during this process.

And HOORAY! I'm done!!!

Strengths Part II

Yesterday I shared my experience with the Strengths Finder. It seems like a lot of you were interested, which I'm so excited about!! If you take the test, please send me your strengths (you can email me here!). I am really interested in learning more about you!


I took the test more than two years ago, and wanted Zac to take it too. He isn't really one for tests. Like, at all. I finally just bought him the book in October of last year, thinking he would take it more seriously once it was an actual possibility. And then I just gently reminded him about it pretty much every night.


So, he took it. In February. Yeah, it only took five months of nagging asking politely every day for him to do it. He's just not one for tests.


The hard part about this story is how I felt when I saw his strengths. I felt like the worst wife in the history of the world. Not only would I not have pegged some of them as his strengths, there were a few that I honestly didn't think I saw in him at all. 


I sent them to our friend Diane who is a certified strengths coach, and she was able to reassure me. She and her husband were our mentor couple during our pre-marriage work, and she said she could see all of them easily. The verdict? My nose was touching the picture frame, so I couldn't see the picture. I needed to step back and really examine our relationship and Zac's role in it to see his strengths.


There are 34 strengths total, and we don't share any of them. It's actually pretty rare to have too many in common with someone you care about. Diane (my life coach friend) and I have three, which is almost unheard of.

Here are Zac's top 5:

1. Consistency.  People who are especially talented in the Consistency theme are keenly aware of the need to treat people the same. They try to treat everyone in the world with consistency by setting up clear rules and adhering to them.
2. Adaptability.  People who are especially talented in the Adaptability theme prefer to “go with the flow.” They tend to be “now” people who take things as they come and discover the future one day at a time.
3. Maximizer.  People who are especially talented in the Maximizer theme focus on strengths as a way to stimulate personal and group excellence. They seek to transform something strong into something superb.
4. Empathy.  People who are especially talented in the Empathy theme can sense the feelings of other people by imagining themselves in others’ lives or others’ situations.
5. Harmony.  People who are especially talented in the Harmony theme look for consensus. They don’t enjoy conflict; rather, they seek areas of agreement.

I saw consistency right away - Zac is all about things being fair and equal. Adaptability was an easy one, too. He is the king of adaptability - and thank goodness, because you know that I am not. His adaptability is probably the number one reason we work as a couple. Harmony was easy for me to see, also.

What I didn't see so much? Empathy. There are so many times it seems like he doesn't understand me. Diane's explanation? I only notice the times he doesn't seem to understand me - not the millions of times everyday that he does. Also, Zac's not a big feelings talker, but that's not what empathy is. When people he loves are upset, he's genuinely bothered by it and feels what they're feeling. Just because he doesn't talk about it doesn't mean he isn't feeling it.

The other one that wasn't clear at first was maximizing, and now his maximizing is controlling my life. I don't know how I never noticed before, but he's really a perfectionist. If he can't do it perfectly, he won't do it at all. Which explains why I eat restaurant quality meals he prepares every night, the radiator cover in our bedroom is perfect (even if it took three weeks to build), and he wants to sweep the patio every single night. 

People's strengths can also be things that drive you crazy about them. Zac never wants to pick what we're having for dinner - which can be annoying. In reality, it's probably because his harmony strength is so high and he seeks to avoid conflicts. We've been able to integrate the strengths terms into our regular vocabulary, and you'll now sometimes hear us saying things like, "I'm just maximizing."

In case you can't tell, this has been a really cool experience for us. To clarify, on a scale of 1 - 10, I'm at a 52 and Zac is about a 6, but honestly, that's where we live for most things. It's a balance, and somehow, it works!

Oh, and my entire family should plan on getting this for the next gift giving occasion. Woo hoo - Christmas will be fun this year!!

My Strengths

I wrote a little bit about the StrengthsFinder here, but I didn't get into too much detail. A few of you were interested in learning more about it, so here you go....

The strengths finder test was developed by Gallup to help people uncover their talents. You buy the book (it's relatively cheap - usually $12-ish), take the online test using the code that comes with your book, and then read what your results mean.

And for me, it was life changing. That's not an exaggeration.

                                 

After you take the assessment, you receive a profile of your top 5 strengths. You only get 5, but trust me, that's enough. According to Gallup's statistics, there are only 8 other people in this world that have the same top 5 strengths in the same order as you do. Eight. And one might be a 93 year old woman, or a six month old little boy. Want to get really crazy? In the entire world, there is not one single other person who has the same 12 strengths as you do in the same order. NO ONE. As if you needed another reason to believe that everyone is here for a purpose (and the stress that comes along with finding out what that purpose is. Oh, is that just me??).

Here are my top 5 strengths with their short definition.

                                                          

1. Responsibility. People who are especially talented in the Responsibility theme take psychological ownership of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and loyalty.
2. Activator. People who are especially talented in the Activator theme can make things happen by turning thoughts into action. They are often impatient.
3. Individualization. People who are especially talented in the Individualization theme are intrigued with the unique qualities of each person. They have a gift for figuring out how people who are different can work together productively.
4. Achiever. People who are especially talented in the Achiever theme have a great deal of stamina and work hard. They take great satisfaction from being busy and productive.
5. Input. People who are especially talented in the Input theme have a craving to know more. Often they like to collect and archive all kinds of information.

If you have a similar experience to me, reading this list will be very validating to you. Your strengths are likely things that you value, and also things that you assume everyone else has because you have them so strongly. 

The most amazing part is really focusing on where your strengths show up. My responsibility strength is probably why I feel so guilty if I don't blog on a regular basis. Individualization? The amount of time I put into picking out the perfect Christmas gift for everyone. Responsibility + Activator + Achiever + Input = my inability to say no to any opportunity. Ever.

Focusing on my strengths has been tremendous for my happiness, my career, my marriage, and my civic engagement. I've been able to narrow down opportunities that don't play to my strengths and focus more time and energy on things that do, which makes me happier and more productive (which makes my Achiever happy).

Most recently, the life coach I've been working with (who is a close friend of mine) helped me work through what's next for me professionally. I had applied to a PhD program to continue my social work studies on a part time basis. Would it feed my Input and Achiever needs? Absolutely. Would it be energizing to me otherwise? Probably not. Together we were able to work through that it wasn't what was best for me at this point, and the weight I felt lifted after making that decision was tremendous. 

Do I sound excited? I want you to catch my enthusiasm. Hopefully you don't think this is too hokey, and I also hope that you'll purchase the book for yourself. Oooh - Gallup, if you read this, maybe you should donate some books for everyone who wants one!! Worth a shot, right?

If you do figure out your strengths, make sure you use them. We'll talk more about that, don't worry. Tomorrow I'll fill you in on the exhausting process it was to get Zac to take the test, and how it's been really awesome to understand each other's strengths. Don't lose sleep waiting for it...

Simplify: Week 2

Last week's simplify challenge was to show up early. I've spent the past week focused on getting places with breathing room to spare. And honestly? It's been great.

Keys to success? Setting my phone so it reminds me 45 minutes before an appointment and then again 30 minutes before. That's my key to start wrapping up whatever I'm working on, and with 30 minutes to go it's usually time to pack up and head out the door.

I will definitely try to make this a habit. It's nice to drive to a meeting and not worry about being late. Plus, I can usually knock out a task or two on my phone if I arrive at my destination early.

So... my second week's challenge.

Ramsland defines two minute pickups as tasks that are too short to write on a to-do list, but that slow the pace of your life if you ignore them too long.

Examples? Unloading the dishwasher. Adding a frequently called number to your phone. RSVPing to an event. Filing a paper on your desk. Labeling a binder. Hanging up your coat. And so on.

I can easily see the benefit in this if I just look at my house. If I take the time to put things where they go, my house is clean. Small tasks done multiple times quickly are much easier than the time it takes to dig out from under them.

For the next week, I'll focus on doing things now that can be done quickly. I won't walk past something that needs to be taken upstairs when I'm going that way. I will hang my clothes up when I take them off. And dang it, my life will be better.

Or something like that!! Does this task fit your life? Are you super good at two minute pickups already (hey Mom!) or could you use some work in this area too? Any tips for success?

Leaving on a jet plane

I'm headed to San Diego this morning for an amazing conference on mindfulness and youth. I can't wait to share the cool things I learn with you when I return.

Please send calming thoughts and prayers my way as I'm flying, which you know I hate to do.

The conference will be so worth how much I hate to fly though -- it looks amazing, and it's a great opportunity for me!



Oh, and this is what our hotel looks like.

          

I guess I can suck it up for a few days... See you next week!

I interrupt these wedding recaps...

Oh my goodness. It's been SO long since I've posted! In my defense, I was neck deep in our annual Summer Program (see this post from last year!) and it overtook my entire life.

But... it ended yesterday, which means that recaps will be finished quickly. Plus, I have some house projects and a fun new surprise to share with you, too!

In the meantime, here's a sneak peak of what we do at our Summer Program. I hope you'll be as impressed with these sweet kids as I am!

What gets me through the day

Ageela is an eighth grader who talks so infrequently that when she does, it startles me because I don't recognize her voice. Today, the students had to write a thank you note to someone who has inspired them to be a leader. When we were leaving, she handed me this:

Just when you start to think that you aren't making a difference...

Checking in

Hello, friends!

I have not been a very faithful blogger recently, and for that I apologize! Things have been crazy around here since Thanksgiving.

• The end of the year means the end of an academic term, so things are busy both at work and for school. All of my school stuff will be wrapped up in the next few days (note: group projects are the worst!) and hopefully things at work will calm down by the end of next week.
• I have almost all of my Christmas presents bought, but almost none of them wrapped! That's on the agenda for this weekend.
• I'm not working on Friday, so hopefully I'll be able to do some sewing and some wrapping... and some holiday baking!!
• We're trying to figure out all of our Christmas plans, and there's just so much to do!! People to see, places to go - so much wonderful, but having it all at one time makes it a bit stressful to schedule.

I'll be back to my regular scheduled posting soon!

I love you today.

Warning: the following story will probably make you sick. Because it's honestly that cute.

My co-worker's husband goes to work earlier than she does, and he sends her a text message very morning that says, "I love you today." This isn't even the cute part.

Today she woke up and he hadn't sent the message. She sent him a text teasing him that he forgot. A little bit later, he sent her a message telling her to look at the window.  And we saw this:

Oh, you can't see what that is? Look closer:

Still not sure? Try one more time:

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? It's a sign stapled to a tree across the street from our office that says, "I LOVE YOU TODAY."

You already know that my darling fiancé doesn't read my blog, so if you talk to him, mention that it would be cool if he did something like this. I'm happy to email your significant other to suggest it for you. 

What do people do all day?

When I was little, this was my favorite book:

I'm not little anymore, but I'm still really interested in what people do all day, and what their workspaces look like. Since I'm interested in yours, I guess I should show you mine!

I work for a really great non-profit called Leadership Scholars. We provide leadership training for inner-city kids in Cincinnati. We're a small 3-person operation, so I get a fancy title and lots of responsibilities. And work with some really fun kids.

Seriously - you know your job is going to be good when this sign is hanging over your desk on your first day:

I'm a social worker, and I coordinate our kids weekly trainings, oversee workshops, develop lesson plans for our curriculum and handle a lot of logistics. I love logistics. I am so good at logistics. 

So here's where the magic happens:

I've had an office in my previous two jobs, but I have to say, I love having a cube. There's something comforting about a small space with bulletin boards for walls. I miss the privacy when talking on the phone, but I like my cube.

My file system. Things that I need to deal with are "in," things that just need to get filed are obviously put in the "file" tray and anything I need to read when I have more time gets stuck in the "read" bin.

This is the wall I face when I'm on my computer, so it houses information I reference a lot, like our calendar of events, contact information for our schools and the list of projects my intern is working on this week. The pictures are of our kids - how cute is that?? They're my inspiration pictures for when I'm having a bad day and can't remember why I want to do this kind of work...

To the left is mainly reference information... a calendar (which I love and am someday going to make an incredible quilt from), how to access my voicemail (because I never check it), an envelope for receipts. More pictures of some of the kids that make me smile. The files are the ones I use most often... everything else lives in a filing cabinet.

I don't always have fresh flowers in my office, but I do today since it's my first day of grad school! Thanks Mom and Dad! The mug with my pens in it was a gift from one of my favorite professors in college. I love the saying (Risk more than others think is safe, care more than others think is wise, dream more than others think is practical, expect more than others think is possible) and I love that it makes me think of her.

So that's where I spend a ridiculously large amount of my time each week... show me what you do all day!!

What did you do today?

We took 200 middle and high school students to Camp Joy, which is a FANTASTIC outdoor education center near Cincinnati. The staff there is wonderful, and they have the coolest activities and ideas.

They also have high ropes courses. The students LOVE these. I, however, do not. Anyone who knows me will be totally shocked at the following pictures.

One of our darling students, Raven, was really scared to climb the tower, so I told her I'd be her partner and we'd go up together and come down when we didn't want to go up anymore. Except once we got up there, she was totally fine and didn't want to come down!

Here we are before we tackled the scary bridge:

And this is what I looked like most of the time (25 feet in the air, by the way!):

Finally celebrating at the end!

I have to say, I certainly put myself out of my comfort zone, and I ended up having a lot of fun. Now I'm exhausted! I'm pretty sure the recipe for recovering from today is hot shower + advil + drink + dinner!

Hope you had a great weekend - did you do anything fun?

Leadership Swag

Quick background: I work for a great nonprofit called Leadership Scholars.We do leadership development training for inner-city kids.  Yeah, I know. Pretty cool job.

We have 100 kids in our Summer Program, with 14 high schoolers / college students who serve as their "Leaders." We also have 10 professional teachers.

Each day we have a morning assembly where the Leaders do an activity to get the Scholars excited, develop leadership skills, have fun, etc.  This is what they did on the first day. I think they just wanted the Scholars to think they were cool... :-) Apparently this is a very popular song, which is why every single kid recognized it and I'd never heard it before. 

Aren't they cute? Oh - and apparently I'm old.  I made a reference during our training week last week and not one of these Leaders remembers when there wasn't a blue M&M.  They also don't know who Punky Brewster is.  Sigh.

Oh man.

I am EXHAUSTED! A full 14 hours after I left for work this morning, I came home! We had a GREAT day at summer camp, but I spent the whole day worrying that something was going to go wrong. It didn't. No one got lost, no one broke a bone...all in all, a success!

These people, the best Summer Program staff a girl could ask for made my life so much easier today:

They LOVE doing stuff like this...

Group two un-human-knotting.

I have been doing so much SHOPPING for the Summer Program. And buying really strange stuff. If you're curious, the following items have made their way into my shopping cart in the past two weeks:

1. 20 skeins of brightly colored yarn
2. 5 chess sets
3. 4 cases of fruit snacks
4. 120 one-inch binders
5. 2 cases of bananas
6. 22 bottles of hand sanitizer
7. 3 Flip Cams
8. 5 Post-it sticky pads
9. 18 walkie-talkies
10. 40 copies of Their Eyes Were Watching God
11. 1 kickball

And that's just some of the cool stuff! Here's to hoping tomorrow goes smoothly and at some point I get my free time back!

Explaining my blogging hiatus

Hi friends!

I'm sorry that I've been missing lately!  I have been spending SO much time preparing for our Summer Program that starts tomorrow morning. 100 middle schoolers + 14 high school Leaders + 10 teachers = 1 exhausted me! I can't believe how much work it's taken to prepare for this 4 week program. I think that I'm ready though!

I am also dying to start some sort of craft project! I'm sending my latest quilt to my favorite long-arm quilter tomorrow (Hi Gramma!) but I just haven't had time to start anything new. I really hope that I'm so prepared for the Summer Program that it just runs itself and I stop having so much work!

On a super fun garden-y note, look what I found tonight!

PEPPERS!

And the cutest baby tomato I've ever seen!

Send me happy thoughts that I haven't forgotten anything major for the Summer Program tomorrow, and with any luck, I'll be back to normal posting this week!